Nights on the roof
by RedBlues
Summary: A few nights that Tasha and Clint spend on the roof
1. Bad Night

_**The first story ever. A bit scary you know. Don`t be that critical, please. At least not today.**_

* * *

That was one of that beauties summer nights. The sky was burning with thousands of blinding stars. There no way you would like to stop staring at it and take your site of, `cause once you do there`s no guarantee that you will see something as remarkable in there as it was a moment ago.

It was a night of a heavy thoughts and terrible nightmares. Even pills won`t help you, don`t you even try, because you will make it even worse, you dreams will become more horribly brighter and more realistic. You won`t be able to run from this one.

Some people, the wise one, just don`t make themselves, they understand, that they`ve better not to. So they go and clear their heads up on the fresh air. Agent Romanoff was not the exception.

For a few days now, she was bothered with cloudy and hard-understandable dreams, to which she didn`t want to come back. So she made a decision, which was absolutely consciously made, not to sleep the rest of the night if she had a bad dream or not to sleep at all. She could allow it to herself, as she was on a break, took some time off after so many assignments. So instead of sleeping she was heading to the Stark Tower roof, where was plenty and enough of space for herself. She tried not to turn anyone's attention while sneaking on the roof, but on the next night she got busted. *Surprise, surprise*. By Clint.

He almost made no noise, but Natasha knew that it was him and he was coming over here. It didn`t scare her, or upset or, anything at all. His coming had changed nothing. She continued sitting just as she did before – non-emotional and careless.

- Nice night to walk around partner. Feeling sad that you hadn`t called – I would`ve brought some cookies and a pillow.

But not even a sound replied, not anything. She still had that dumb look in the middle of nowhere.

-Or, you know, I could`ve bring some beer in here. Or… why to hell should we waste our time on trifles - I could`ve taken a bottle of vodka. That would be nice, ha? Don`t you think.

Nothing. He even started thinking, that he must`ve be dreaming, or it`s a doll sitting in front of him – not Tasha.

-Nat? Nat! Are you alright?

-Yeah, yeah... – Finally, said quite shattered voice. – I just like listening you talking. Keep on. I`m here. I`m alright. Not needed in a pillow, `cause I'm obviously going to sleep, or cookies, or beer, or vodka. For Christ sake, Vodka? Srsly?

Her face looked tired, well, not only face – everything, from her finger to her toes, looked like that. She looked…"done". And not only looked. It was obviously that she felt the same. She was about to fall asleep but she was not letting herself to.

-Stop being stubborn and go get some sleep. It seems that you haven`t slept for days...about...four. Four right? Or five? Answer honestly.

-It`s the fifth one. And I feel fine.

-No, you are not. What happened? Is something bothering you? If it`s all in Thor`s snoring I swear I'll make him sleep quietly.

-No, no it`s okay. Let him do what he usually does. He`s staying only for a few days, so I think it`s alright. Everyone will bear it two more days.

-Then what is it? What`s wrong?

-Nightmares. I`m sure they will past, but just… not now. It`s because of my mission, from which I just came back. Everything was going great, until rebels cooperated with refugees and everything started getting critical and mass, and cruel, and then even more cruel, and more horrible. I`m the assassin, I'm okay with these things. But once, unexpectedly, when the territory was protected and was under my custody, I heard woman screaming. Someone started shooting repeatedly and then the baby cried. But we were too far. And when we got there it was too late – the woman was dead, and blood was everywhere, - a tar slipped from Natasha`s cheek, - and we saw there a baby. An innocent baby who he left behind, out of mercy or something, with is already dead mother, in whose blood he`s been crying and screaming for mommy. He has no one now, you know? I just can`t forget that look in his eyes. It comes for me every night, saying "It`s your fault, it`s your fault, you hadn`t seen it through – you hadn`t seen the killer".

Widow started weeping frantically. Hawkeye pulled her to him, hugged her tightly and leaned to her head with lips. A sun was about to rise.


	2. Good Night

_**Just one more story, another night on the roof, together.**_

* * *

A nice night to dream. And be a little thoughtful. Enjoy the moment that you currently experiencing. And also dream. Being in the dreamy mood. Have dreamful thoughts. And everything else that you can add to "dream".

She felt that way. She had that dreamy state right now, at 4 a.m. in the morning. The sun was about to rise. To rise that beautiful, that it would`ve brought up her creativity and fantasy from the deep hole in her soul in which she buried all that years ago.

She sat on the roof of the Stark Tower, leaning on the wall near doors of the elevator. She was staring at the sky, so careless and peacefully, just like the sky was by itself right now. There were only a few stars seen that night, but the view was still beautiful, and, as it seemed to her, even more charming.

She has already been there for an hour and regretted not even a moment that she spent sitting on the floor and doing nothing under the open sky. She felt calm. A rare feeling in her life.

But something was missing. A little piece of a puzzle. A piece that would have perfectly fit in her perfect morning-night sitting on the roof, in her perfect mood and state, under perfect open, almost clear, peaceful sky. Some perfect piece was missing. It was hardly noticeable, but it still was.

Then He easily broke into, rushed lightly out of the elevator to the edge of the roof. Then he stopped, stared straight up into the sky with a thoughtful look and half-said-half-sang quietly "_Green eyes…"_

He sighted and looked down, just like regretting about something.

-Like tour headset. Whatcha listening to? – She asked with a peaceful slight smile. She heard he half sang something, but she hadn`t really understood what was it.

-Oh, shoot, Tasha! – He sighted worriedly, - I hadn`t seen you over there. I`m too restful right now, lost my seriousness and preparedness for any surprises and threats. But it`s such a good night! Too good, actually. Just like the night before the storm. But still good.

-Hey, Clint? You`re talking too much, - she smiled gently, - focus. What are you listening to? It should be something really good – never herd you sinning, partner. I wanna know what it is. Tell me.

-Wait, wait, wait. Hold on, - he stopped with some seriousness on his face, and then smiled. – Whose talking too much now, ha? – He laughed and she smiled too. –I`m not gonna tempt and make you wait for the answer for this question you asked, - continued he diplomatically, with a smile playing on his face. – The song is called "Green eyes".

He looked down and slightly blushed, which couldn`t be seen in the dark.

-Not that special, - he started to evade from the details and all the future questions about the song, - I just heard it on the radio once, and it was okay, and… it`s not that good.

He understood he made a mistake half-singing-half-saying those two words. He wanted her to forget about it and talk about something else.

-Really? Are you sure? Let me listen. – She held out her hand in his direction with a smile. – Let the woman try.

He walked to her and sits near. Took of his headset and…put it in his pocket, with a little embarrassment and blushed cheeks, which, again, weren`t seen in the dark, even sitting that close.

-Not today alright? Maybe later, okay? I promise you`ll hear it one day.

It was pronounced with some hope. A hope that someday the situation will change between them in something more. Yeah, someday.

She looked a little upset, because Clint said no. He said "no" to her. "What's the matter with that song? How weird and dirty it can be? But at least he promised. That`ll be interesting. Oh, he`s definitely teasing me! Such a bastard". Her face turned to smiling again.

-Why aren`t you sleeping, Barton? Had a nightmare or something?

-I hadn`t been sleeping actually. But I feel fine. Some kind of the insomnia.

-Who? You? Having insomnia? – She giggled. – I don`t believe you. You always fall asleep in a click. What made you sleepless? I bet it`s this gorgeous night. Just look at the sky! – She pointed with her finger up into the sky, leading Clint`s sight after her hand, right into space.

-Yeah, maybe. – He answered not quietly sure. – And why are you up? Insomnia again too?

-Not really. I`ve already slept and it`s seems that I got enough of it. So I decided to watch some sky today. It`s nothing to do at night here anyway. – She smiled. – I`m glad I changed my bed to this. So many thoughts come into my head right now. I don`t know what happened to me today, but I feel another way right now.

She dreamily looked up with lightly excited smile. He, in his turn, dreamily looked at her and smiled. His eyes started to close unexpectedly, but he tried to hold it and delay his going to his cold bad. He felt much better now. In here.

The sun was about to rise. Even first rays of it showed from the edge. Natasha started a little fussing because of the view of the sunrise. It was unpleasant to leave right now, but she still was going to do it before it`s too late.

-I will go to the gym, I think. - She said with some uncertainty and absentmindedness. – Are you coming with me?

Clint was taken by surprise with Tasha`s future ran away out of the roof. Just why now? Although, it was a good suggestion about gym, but he couldn`t. His sleepiness took him by surprise in not a good moment, just like Natasha`s offer. He`d like to, but he couldn`t.

-Sorry, not in the mood right now. I`ll sit here a little longer, stare a little – your dreamy state was passed to me a little. So I stay. It`s too good in here to leave. Maybe you`ll stay?

-No. But thanks. See you later.

She waved unconfidently. So did him. At least smile was added to a full package.

The elevator closed – he was left alone on the roof. He took out his headset, put them on and turned on the same song, on which he was caught. He fully leaned on the wall, closed his eyes and let the song lead him.

'_And honey you should know__  
__That I could never go on without you__  
__Green eyes...'*_

* * *

*A song by Coldplay – "Green Eyes"


	3. Gambling

She had a bottle of vodka in her right hand. He had a bottle of expensive whisky. Both stolen from Stark's bar. They were half dancing, half jumping, and behaving like animals which were released from the zoo under the rain. Their clothes were wet because of it, but the rain was getting even harder – it seemed there would be a huge storm soon.

But they didn`t care. They were having fun with no music except the rain. It was the first one after many months and they were here, on the roof, to celebrate it. Both of them had rough missions that ended not long ago, so they were drinking till the sunrise. Or at least until the storm came.

They got tired of all that – stopped behaving like wild ones, but still were drinking and eagerly watching each other, smiling. After calming down and taking another sip, Natasha started.

"Wanna play?"

Clint raised his eyebrow playfully. "Play what?"

"I thought my drinking games were popular". She sounded affectedly offended.

"Yeah, but which one?"

They laughed a little, taking more of the alcohol. "Let`s start with 'I`ve never…'. Are you in?" She gave him a tricky smile.

"No one's around. " He jokingly looked around, confirming that. "And I'm willing to take my chances."

"I`ll start." She thought for a minute than started again. "I've never slept with a girl".

Both of them drank.

Clint shook his head, unsatisfied.

"That`s not fair. You`re taking every chance to make me drink".

"Are you afraid?" She murmured.

"Not today, babe. It's you who has to be afraid." He pointed at her with a bottle. She chuckled at that ridiculous statement.

"I had never…" he pondered for a little to make a drink "…believed in a monsters from tails". He seemed to be shy about it, so he bowed his head and took a drink. It was silent until he heard as liquid moved in the bottle of vodka. He raised his head and saw Natasha drinking without stopping. Then she stopped, squinted, and gave him a trashed look.

"What? All of us were kids. And everyone has their demons. Don`t forget that!" She pointed half at him, half at something else. Clint grinned.

"My turn!" She raised her hand up, showing she was going speak now. The gesture reminded him how a student raised her hand to get the teacher's attention. And seeing as Natasha was doing that was… well, that was ardent. She was hot. With every minute he saw so how smoking hot she was even more and more.

"I've never had sex on the roof" She took two sips, while seeing that Clint was shyly staring at his bottle.

Natasha was puzzled a little. "Are you a virgin or something? Or the only woman that had you there was your Karen?" Oh, she was having fun.

"What?" Clint looked bewildered and resentful. "Do you mean my bow?" Tasha nodded. "Oh, Jesus Christ! How disgusting is that! Fuck, eww!" Yeah, he seemed to be disgusted while she scoffed. "And I've had sex, just not on the roof. It`s sacred! Just like my bow!" He shook his head, trying to get rid of the image of him and…Oh fuck. He'd drank too much for this picture to easily fade away. So he drank more.

"My turn." He blurted still disgusted and a little bit offended.

"You`re missing a lot, you know."

"What?" He started coughing, imagining her and a bow…

"I mean the roof". He sighed with relief. "It`s a great feeling, you know. A lot of space", she lifted her hand, in a gesture like "Look at this place!" Then turned back to Clint. "And it feels risky a little on the edge". She smirked.

But the only thought that Clint had was "Was that an invitation?" He tried to hide his doubts, surprise and excitement.

"Your turn".

He wanted to invent some sexy question/statement that would make her blush and maybe get a little frustrated. Yes, he wanted that. He wanted something more romantic right now, something that would pull them closer. But he couldn`t let himself. They were partners.

And then he looked at her. There she was, small, fighty, drunk and wet, and so damn sexy. "Screw partnership", he thought. But if he wanted that, all his desires to come true, first of all he needed to stop the game, but only by her initiative. So he had to ask her something awkward so she would change the game to another. And after that he could make her want the same that he did. He wanted her to want him, just like he wanted her. Right now, right here. He _needed _her to make the first move 'cause it wouldn`t work if he did. And he knew exactly how to do it. Oh yeah, he was an insidious son of a bitch.

"I have never had a kitten" He took a shot calmly, waiting for her reaction. He knew she had once had one, but she was an assassin without feelings – she thought it is humiliating for her to be girly enough to have a kitten.

She blushed, freezing for a second. She secretly turned away from him and took a small sip.

"Ha! I saw that! I knew you had one!" He pointed at her with a smile playing on his lips.

"Shit." She was revealed. "I had him only two days! It doesn`t count! I was just looking after him for a boy! It doesn`t count! He wasn`t even mine!" She tried to defend herself, to prove that she wasn`t weak as she thought.

"Then why would you take a shot then?" He was looking right through her. "Because she felt like it was hers" he said to himself.

Tasha shamefully looked at the floor. "Another game," was all she said.

Clint`s plan was working. He was so proud of himself now. She had to at least kiss him today. Even if it would be out of desperation.

"Okay, then. Your bet game".

She felt relieved now. "Remember the rules?"

"Yeah, quite simple. No money or favors in future. Everything is happening right here, right now. You have to do it no matter what. We take turns doing bets. They contain action, that`s all. You can`t change what you said that your opponent has to do; we have only a few exceptions. Am I right?"

Tasha nodded. "I`m first!" She volunteered. "I bet you won`t be able to take 10 sips from my bottle without blinking, shivering or any reaction. And also no reaction after it for 5 seconds. Oh, I wish that was a money bet thing. I would`ve won a fortune". She was excited.

Clint was interested. "So you think I can`t do it?" She shook her head.

"Okay". He took her bottle, stood in front of her. His last words were "Enjoy" and he started drinking vodka.

She looked at him suspiciously and skeptically, trying to see at least one micro-emotion. But there was none. She counted ten and started counting seconds loudly now, so he could hear.

"1…" She was staring at him. "2…" She couldn`t believe he was still emotionless. "3…" She had two more seconds for him to fail. "4..." She felt he was close. But as she starting pronouncing 'fi..." he blinked.

"Ha!"

Clint finally started blinking rapidly and shivered as much as he could. He even jumped a few times to make that feeling go away, and breathed heavily.

"That doesn`t count, Tash!" Clint couldn't believe that he broke at the last nanosecond. Partly, it was her eyes' fault. So beautiful. And the damn rain. His plan was about to fall apart.

"You are a loser! And it`s official!" It seemed like she was dancing now.

"That was the last second! And I could make it! Just this rain…" There was no excuse.

She was making fun of him. He felt ashamed. "Fuck", all he could think of. Oh, and how stupid he was.

When she got tired from dancing and laughing, the lightning flashed in the sky. Tasha walked straight to him and demanded her bottle which she finished quickly. She could tell him what to do again, and all because he lost.

"I bet you won`t be able to smash this bottle with your ass." She said playfully, giving him the bottle.

Clint thought that was childish. She knew he could do it, so she gave him a chance, because _she_ wanted to be tested. He laughed at this and thought that it would be easy because of his state – drunk – and his muscles, of course. But if he wasn't able to do it, he always had his ways to cheat.

So he took the bottle, looked at it closer, put it on the floor and sat at it. As Natasha was watching him, she secretly hoped he could do it. And when she heard the bottle was cracking, a playful smile appeared on her face. "If even his ass was that strong, what about…" She cleared her head quickly, as Clint rose and showed her the remnants of the bottle with pleased smile.

"Do you understand that you`ll have to share your whiskey with me?" she mumbled.

"Not until you, drunkie, make a triple flip like those gymnasts in the gyms. From that corner to this corner, landing on the edge."

That was risky enough. She was drunker that he was, and it could end fatally. But it was Natasha they were talking about. She was absorbing vodka like it was light beer. She could make it. She should.

Natasha winced at him, which Clint laughed at because it was so playful and childish and challenging, and she strode to the edge. Clint held his breath.

She started running. Now she was ready to jump – looked so determined to do it. First flip, second. She was close to the end. Now the third one.

Her hands shook as they touched the roof for the third time and when she landed on her toes, she was on the very edge. Her heels weren`t on the ground – they were above, and she was standing on her tiptoes. As she was up already, she looked smugly at him, right into his eyes; her legs shook again, and it seemed like she was going to lose balance and fall from the roof.

He met her eyes, and Clint`s heart stopped for a second as she was about to lose control. He couldn`t breathe. There was horror in his eyes, even thought his face was calm, showing that he believed in her and that he knew that everything was going to be fine.

Her body suddenly started bending away from the roof. She was trying to catch some air with her hands and come back to the position in which she was two seconds ago. There was no horror on her face. Just a drunk amusement, and she was about to laugh. So reckless. She accidentally looked down, waving with her hands, excited by the view from the Stark`s Tower…

And that`s when Spiderman appeared.

_Okay, not true. No Spiderman. You can breathe again._

Tasha was like a tumbler in that moment – she bent away, and now she was bending back towards the roof. That`s when she hopped off, and approached Clint with a smug look on her face.

Clint breathed again. He looked quickly at the floor, removing the horror from his eyes – she shouldn`t see that. But he could swear that he was about to die himself. It was like someone ripped his heart out. He wanted to hug her, put her close to him and never let go. He wanted to give her some kind of protection to be sure that she was safe.

It wasn`t like on the missions. It was even more. It was deeper. And now he needed her desperately.

He made himself give her the bottle of whiskey and a smile. She took a few shots and then glanced at him proudly, like she had just won some prize.

"You had nearly pissed your pants, didn`t you?" She said, not understanding the danger she'd put herself in. He rolled his eyes at her.

"No I didn`t. Why would I? It wasn`t more dangerous than a child starting to walk for the first time."

He was trying to show his coolness, but realized how ridiculous his words were. Bad metaphor.

Tasha looked amused and a little angry at him. She had just almost fallen from the skyscraper, and he says it`s like a baby's first steps? Oh, she was furious.

"Oh, yeah? Then you go and jump from the edge!"

She bite her tongue and ordered herself to shut up as he started to walk to the edge. She regretted her words the next moment. They were in the middle of the game where every demand or instruction had to be done.

"Okay, I didn`t mean that". Her funny face changed to regretful. Regretful for being drunk and stupid.

He placed his feet on the edge. "Your words are a law for me". He bowed to her with a pleasant smile and turned away from her. She couldn`t see his face so he sighed with horror. "She has to be desperate", he reminded himself.

She was horrified. Clint was standing there and was about to jump.

"Okay", she said calmly, trying to put as much playfulness as she could, and that, to be honest, not much. "I want to change my challenge, if you really think it was, anyway". She couldn`t speak coherently. But she was doing her best.

He slightly turned his head to her, as if he were interested.

"That would be your exception for the first time, Romanoff!" He exclaimed. He was counting on this exception.

"Well, it`s my game". She felt like she was a teenage girl who asked her boyfriend not to leave and admitting that she was stupid. Close enough.

"I bet you won`t be able to toss this bottle into the next building." She was nervous already.

"Nope. It`s not covering a jump from the roof. It`s not serious enough. I give you a minute".

It was like now _she_ was the one who was about to stop breathing. She started to think nervously and drank even more, trying to come up with something.

"What can possibly be more serious? There`s nothing more serious then killing yourself!" She was freaking out – her partner was about to jump from the skyscraper and it was her fault…Partner…

"2 minutes, Romanoff". Clint himself was horrified by the idea of jumping. But he couldn`t retreat. He started this game and he was going to finish. No matter where it led him.

"Partners…" she thought. And that`s when _that_ thought crossed her mind. No, she couldn`t. Or could she? No, no, no. He`s her partner. What if he will just look at her like she`s crazy? Or lost her mind? No, she just couldn`t do that.

But what if he wanted that? What if that bastard had done everything on purpose? He knows that there`s no step more serious to her than to reveal her feelings or to start a relationship. It was her top. So what if he wanted that? Clint fucking Barton was provoking her?

"1…" He announced.

But there was no doubt in his voice. She was lost. But she figured if it sounded weird, she could always say that she was drunk. Yes, she made her _desperate_ and stupid decision.

"Then come and kiss me", she said quietly, and so innocently.

He couldn`t believe his ears. She did that. She said that. He felt like there were damn butterflies in his stomach and his heart started to beat faster.

"Shit, Barton, get your ass over here and _do_ it!" She was pointing with her finger angrily but she still looked desperate and frightened.

He smiled. Oh, she was demanding.

He turned around and quickly headed to her. Seeing her so scared made him want to feel her close and protected even harder.

Her eyes expanded as he was coming closer. So determined. And sexy.

He grabbed her passionately and kissed her as deep and rough as he could. He needed it to happen. He wanted her to feel how needy he was. He placed his hands around her waist and pulled her closer to him. She, moving with his rhythm and being taken under her feelings, clasped her hands around his neck.

As Clint looked back to that night, he thought how stupid he was. He took a huge risk and put them both in danger to test her and make his wish come true. It could have ended badly. Like lethal.

Their bodies got hotter and hotter as their kiss became deeper. That`s when the storm began.

* * *

_It would`ve been nice to have some reviews for such a huge chapter._


	4. Cold

Clint wasn`t merciful that day. Anger, and passion; regret, and desperation were raging in his mind, conquering his body. Those feelings captured him from inside, all over.

He couldn`t calm down, not even for a minute or a tiny second. He was repeatedly tapping his finger against his arms, legs, table, the elevator - any place he could reach with his hand. With this small unobtrusive tapping he kept himself from hitting the table, elevator, door, etc. The tapping was the only glimpse of his impatience and rage that he let himself show.

Yes, he was the Hawk, that kind of thing wasn't his normal behavior. But the situation had thrown him.

He knew he could find her on the roof. It was only a matter of _when_ she would get there, stand on the edge and unleash her rage. At least in her mind, to herself.

He knew her. He knew her too well, and he sometimes didn't know if that was a good or bad thing. Sometimes (when he gets drunk, mostly), he regrets knowing her _that_ well. Too well for his sake. And that's what killing him. He knows everything she will ever do, every move, and every thought that will ever hit her brilliant head. And what scares him most is change. Change in her reactions, moves, thoughts. Because if she changes, that could mean only three things: 1. Total shutdown; 2. Absence of feelings; 3. Unpredictability. And_ that's_ what scared him most. Because if it happens, it'll be permanent, he can be sure of it.

But he hadn't really cared about it when they had 'that' talk, or when he was in the bar, or when he was heading to her on the roof to have one more unpleasant situation-conversation, suffice to say.

Seriously, he didn't know what had he been thinking. Death wish, maybe?

Before opening the door to the roof top, his common sense briefly flared to life, but was suppressed. He was ready to make any reckless or stupid move he intended to do. Or he thought he was.

Anyway, God bless him.

Natasha was beyond pissed.

With one hand he opened the door; the other one was resting in his jeans pocket. His position was casual, screaming his carelessness, that he didn`t mind anything that was going around him. It seemed like he wasn`t afraid of the Romanoff wave.

He just walked in there, stood in front of her, giving her his best I-don`t-care look, as he slipped his other hand into his pocket. He gave her questioning, mocking look, with one brow up. He really couldn`t care less.

She looked calm for the first time. But then, seeing his countenance, she became concerned and angry. She wanted suddenly to beat the crap out of him for doing this to her. With only the one tiny look Clint gave her, he broke her heart.

They were staring at each other. A mean smile was playing on his face.

Oh, how angry she was.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

He grinned. And it was getting even bigger.

"Why are you doing this to me?" She was calm now, whispering these words with only small note of desperation and offence.

His grin spread wider. He was enjoying this. And she couldn`t believe her eyes.

A cold wind blew from the north. It was end of the autumn and she wore only a tiny top, skinny jeans and a pair of boots. Even though she had experienced much colder weather, she shivered violently and crossed her arms across her stomach, hugging herself, protecting.

He wore a jacket. He would always put it on her shoulders, even if he didn't really need to. If there was the slightest wind and she was not dressed properly, there it was! Already on her shoulders.

But not now. He didn`t even blink. Total indifference.

"Why are you so cold?"

He scoffed once; his expression clearly communicating "how-stupid-are-you."

"Are you gonna _freaking_ answer me?" She was screaming now. "I don`t deserve the silent treatment, you _idiot_."

His grin disappeared. His look darkened. He lowered his head a little and looked at her sullenly.

"That`s all you deserve."

He was dancing on the pieces of her heart now.

She tried to catch her breath. She couldn`t exhale. Huge gulps came to her throat. Her eyes were swollen. It was the second time he had made her cry.

But not a single tear rolled down her face.

"Why?" She choked.

Seeing her like this was frustrating. His conscience came back to him, and he regretted being _that_ cold and distant. That feeling was reflected in his eyes for a few seconds, but then he remembered everything she had done to him and he turned into the emotionless bastard again. He crossed his arms across his chest, in a clearly defensive position.

"I thought you loved me." Silence. As he calmed, he continued, "But you took it and tossed it into the trash can. Like it meant nothing to you."

She couldn't breathe. It felt like she was choking. She couldn't believe it. _He _was accusing her of "tossing" his love away, never mind that _he_ was the one who ended their relationship.

Silence hung thick in the air. She couldn`t understand what was going on, and he started walking away.

And then, anger possessed her. It was _his_ fault that he was broken hearted. With no reason, by the way! She had done absolutely _nothing_. She was enjoying their relationship, truly enjoying. It was he who broke _her_ heart. He had probably just been messed up in his own head, overthinking. Again.

And bang! He breaks up with her. Then bang! He`s having a make out session in the bar with some chick the same day. Then bang! He`s avoiding her and giving her cold stares.

What the fuck is all that?

"Clint Francis Barton! Don`t you even dare to walk out like this, you old fart!" The surprise on his face, when he was about to open the door to escape, was complete. He stopped and froze. "I don`t deserve your attitude right now! And I don`t care _what_ cockroaches in your head are whispering to you, what kind of mad ideas! I want an explanation right now! So get your ass over here, you dirty cheater!"

With her last words, his anger flashed. He couldn`t believe she said that after everything that she had done? Oh, he wasn`t going to leave it like that.

He turned around unexpectedly, and quickly walked to her. He almost crashed into her, such was the rage guiding his steps. He bent over her, towering over her, and using a threatening voice.

"You are the _last_ person in the world who can accuse me of that!"

She wasn`t afraid of him. His actions, his voice, his position. But there was something in his words. She couldn`t understand. What the hell was he talking about?

She stepped back in awe, giving him a questioning look.

'_She doesn`t even suspect what am I talking about.' _Clint thought. And she wasn`t pretending. He knew her. He could tell.

But that didn`t make him any less angry.

"And why is that?" She asked angrily.

"Because you`re a fucking whore!" He was screaming with the force of his entire throat straight into her face.

She stopped him with a slap.

His head jerked to the left with the impact. He closed his eyes trying to calm himself down. His breath was intermittent, unstable. He didn`t really mean to say it. Well, maybe he _had_, but not in that way, not that harsh.

A tear rolled down her cheek. She quickly covered her face with her hands, leaving her eyes uncovered to see Clint. She was completely crushed. She had never expected something like that from the closest person she ever had, that she truly loved.

A huge sob broke out of her chest. She was trying to calm herself down, but his words were spinning in her head, playing like a melody over and over. She turned around – she couldn`t face him anymore.

As he heard that sob of hers he felt suddenly guilty. He wanted to kill himself, that was how guilty he felt. He had seen her crying only once before, and that was the worst thing that ever happened to him. He promised himself that no one would lead her to such state again, that he would never see her like that again.

And here she is, so exposed, unprotected, almost broken. And who caused it? Clint Fucking Barton, who else.

Hundreds of spies tried to kill him, but no one succeeded. But right now, he could die just from the one sound coming from her chest. He wanted to wrap his arms around her, comfort her, kiss, lust her, apologize; say that nothing matters, nothing at all; that he doesn`t care if she had someone else – he could deal with that; even thought she was cheating, lying to him every second; even if her feelings weren`t real –he just wanted her to stay, to be at least partly his. He could`ve fought to get her back, or at least just fight for her, just be with her, be there for her, love her. He could cope with that, maybe, someday, he could handle that. He would do anything.

He could deal with everything. But not her tears, not that terrible, gasping sob.

He had already dropped his mask, for good. He was staring at her back, regretting. He could do nothing now – he had said those words, the cat was let out of the bag.

He felt guilt in his heart. What he had just done was the greatest mistake in his life.

A cold wind blew from the North, which made them both shiver. From cold or from something else, though, is a completely different story.

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Please review!

Plus i`m not sure if i have to continue this story at all.


	5. No is not an answer

Hello! Okay, short story in here! But i want to remind you that there`s no sertain sequence between the stories. Something happenned earlier, something later. But i can say that this one takes place after "Gambling".

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She was sitting on the edge, looking at her hands, not willing to face the world. She was staring so damn hard that a hole was about to appear, burned into the air in front of her.

In her thoughts, she was scrolling through everything that had happened recently. It made her stiffen. The brightest memory was her screaming, and gasping. And Clint calling out her name.

His warm body, hot breath, demanding kiss, his lips; his soft touch, his delicate movements. Crumpled sheets, ripped pillows, torn clothes, pieces of cloth that had once been underwear.

The sound of her screaming for him.

God bless whatever smart bastard invented soundproofed walls.

She rubbed her neck and winced – her body still hurt: bruises and scratches found sanctuary on her back, hands, legs…It was easier to say where they weren`t placed.

She moved her hand, tucking her arms behind her knees. Oh, how messed up this was.

She heard as the door opened, then softly closed. She didn't hear his steps, but she knew he was coming. It had to happen.

He approached, but stopped behind her. After few seconds of consideration, as she thought, he bent over and kissed her on top of her head. Her eyes widened slightly – that wasn't what she had expected.

What`s the fluff for? She thought.

He stepped closer to the edge and sat next to her. She was still looking at her hands.

Like a freaking mirror, he copied her position and everything, before falling into silence and stillness once again.

He looked at her. She looked sad and worried. It was unlike his Natasha.

"What`s wrong?" he asked, concerned.

She gave him confused look, like he was missing something obvious.

"Are you serious?"

He blinked twice, not really understanding what was going on.

"Two of SHIELD's best agents had non-stop sex in the Tower less than 24 hours ago!" She was freaking out.

"Are you worried about the location? If you don`t like doing it in Tower-which has soundproofed walls, by the way-we can move and…" He behaved calmly, like this was normal.

"No, Clint! It`s not about that! It's about us," she gestured with her hand between the two of them. "We can`t do this!"

"What?" He was taken aback by her words. Shocked would be a better word. She had wanted every piece of his body, had wanted every millimeter between them to be closed just a few hours ago, and now she was pushing him away? "You can`t be serious!" He shook his head in desperation.

'Yes, I am. We are partners, SHIELD agents, half of the Avengers team and also friends! I`m not willing to destroy that in one night!"

"Stop freaking out, Natasha! We`re not going to destroy anything!" But she wasn`t listening to him.

"I don`t even know what that was!"

"What what was?" He looked at her, bewildered.

"Oh, God. I feel like a freaking teenager… Sex! Sex, Clint! What the hell was that?"

"Emmm…Sex, I guess?"

"Oh, you are such a freaking child, Barton!" she spat.

"Come on! It was a passionate act of love with some actual warm feelings," he started, and then continued quietly "That I hope will continue. Or happen again. At least some day".

She gazed at him, confused. So what had happened between them hadn't been a sudden onset of stupidity as she thought.

"It happened because of a freaking game! Where you wanted to jump of the roof! You can`t be serious!"

"Oh yes I can. I thought everything through."

"We were drunk, Clint" She said quietly.

"Don`t care."

"Well, I do."

They sat silently, like someone was dying. Like a tragedy rolled over. Like they were enslaved or something…Wait, what?

"Tasha this is ridiculous. We haven't come to anything concrete, or anything even close."

"It`s not right, okay?" She shook her head and sighed.

"Well, what is right in this world? Hell, we're assassins, Tash! Nothing in our world is right!" He looked pleadingly at her. "But this! I finally feel like something's right! This is right! It feels like nothing before. It`s the best thing that I have ever done! The most right thing. I'm even proud of it! I have no doubt in my words. None."

He had a feeling that he would`ve have convince her. He wanted that: nights spend together, her warmth next to his body, her touch…He wanted her near him in every sense. Damn, he was in love!

"No." She closed her eyes and sighed.

He clenched his fists. _Why is she so stubborn_? he thought.

"So, I see you have everything already figured out, hey?" He said through gritted teeth. This woman always had to do everything her way.

"Pretty much."

"So what? Are you going to act like this never happened?" His eyes were closed, fists still clenched, teeth still gritted.

"Pretty much."

"And we're going to act like partners, just like always?"

"God, Barton!" She was pissed now. "Just stop it! How many questions will there be? Another thousand?" While speaking, she had been turned with her body towards him. Then, quickly, she was already on her feet, above him. "This topic is closed, okay? End of conversation!"

She started walking away, angry. And not because of his statements, but because of her own stubbornness. She couldn`t face the fact that she actually liked him. Honestly, she was crazy about him. Who wouldn`t be? She'd known him for so long. And the tension between them had been growing more and more. She was suppressing it, but last night, it broke out. In a huge burst of energy and passion. In sex.

And the weirdest thing was that he wanted it, too. He felt it, too. Oh yes, he did. Had proved it beyond a doubt. In bed, with his words… Oh, those memories! They were killing her! She was thirsty for more. Again, who wouldn`t be, if they knew? If they had experienced, felt, heard…

When she stood up, he was on his heels already. He followed her quickly, impatiently. She was opening the door when his hand shut it abruptly in her face and he turned her around, pushed her brutally to the wall, and crushed his lips into hers.

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_Review, review, review._


	6. Reactions

Clint and Natasha burst through the door – they were in danger of falling off the roof because their laughter was so wild that they could hardly stand on their feet. Both of them were bent and were holding their stomachs, like they might explode at any minute.

"Do you remember…?" Natasha couldn`t finish her question –one look at Clint and there was another burst of laughter. Clint didn't need her to finish the sentence – he understood it too well.

In a couple minutes, both of them were ready to have a small talk. They were already sitting on the ground. Well, half sitting for Natash, and Clint was trying to shift to a sitting position from his lying one.

"Oh my god, that was priceless!" Natasha choked, while wiping tears from her cheeks.

"I can`t erase his face from my memory! Oh god, I hope Jarvis has footage of that, because that had to be captured! I could print those photos…and oh god. This day has just become history!"

Clint finally found his spot in front of Natasha and made himself as comfortable as he could. They looked straight in each other's eyes, and a few seconds later they giggled again.

"My memory keeps showing me Steve's face when he saw what was in your present! I can`t even believe that Stark did that! I wouldn`t dare, honestly."

"Well, I expected something like that. It`s Stark we're talking about." She answered calmly with an imperturbable smile on her face.

"Are you serious? I thought you would kill him right then and there. How did you do that? I mean, staying so calm. For a second I thought I saw a hint of happiness on your face. That present would totally justify murder, especially by you. At least Stark should have received a death glare."

"I didn't have time to get angry, you know. I just looked at Stark, and he was mischievously smiling and winking at me and then, in the corner of my eye, I saw something red. It wasn`t a balloon – it was Steve`s face! And everything started… The great event wasn't Stark`s present, like he thought it would be. It was Steve`s reaction." She shrugged with a kind smile.

"Come on, Tash! I thought you were going to rip him into pieces when I saw those handcuffs in that box! Thank God, I hadn`t seen the rest of that stuff in there, but I think it`s something I wouldn`t like to know, right?" Clint asked cautiously, a little bit afraid of the answer.

"Oh, believe me you wouldn`t" Natasha turned slightly red. And now Clint was interested anyway.

"So…would you say that you liked the present?" He drew his conclusion from the blush she couldn't hide. This was getting delicate.

"Don`t know yet. But anyway, it complements the arsenal that I have."

Clint`s eyes widened – he was obviously shocked. He wasn`t prepared for this twist. Natasha looked directly in his eyes, seriously, testing him. When she saw the reaction on his face, she started laughing and slapped his leg lightly in a friendly way, just fooling around.

"Did you actually believe that?" Clint remained numb, realizing how unfunny that joke was. "Oh, come on! It`s too easy to shock you." She continued giggling, while Clint tried to work a smile onto his face.

"Yeah, right". But he failed miserably.

"Oh, poor Francis. You remind me of Steve right now".

"Hey! You promised you wouldn`t use my second name!"

"It`s my birthday. I can do anything I want." She winked at him and laughed at her own playfulness. Clint couldn`t beat that argument. "Anyway, it was an unusual present. No one's ever given me something like that before. Maybe, Stark sensed with one of his 10 senses that I don`t have anyone around, and that I've been lonely for the past few years, so he decided to get me a present like that…well, you know what for."

"It`s a joke right?" Clint turned pale.

"Of course it is, you idiot! Anyway, where's _your_ present to me?"

"Oh," Clint didn`t know what to answer. The package was still on the border; they were checking something 'suspicious' about it, and all that stuff with government. He had nothing to present her, except for the flowers that he had given her earlier. "It`s…um…not here yet".

Natasha grimaced. "Where is it?"

"Well…" Clint trailed off. "It`s shipping…stuck at custom's. It'll be here soon. But unfortunately, not today." He bent his head down, like it was his fault.

"Clint, it`s my birthday! Why couldn`t you just go to Brazil and buy it! Why would you ask them to send it to you?" Tasha couldn`t really understand why he had to complicate everything. But then she realized that she had said something she shouldn't have known, and bit her lip, turning her head to another side, like nothing happened.

Clint's eyes widened and he looked astonished at Natasha. "What did you just say?"

She stood up, checked her dress, and was ready to go. "I think we should go see how Tony's doing, because I think Pepper was furious when we left." She pointed in the direction of the door, acting like nothing happened before, nothing slipped from the tip of her tongue.

"Did you snoop and find out what I got you?"

"I wasn't snooping!" She started defending herself. "I just found out from the history of your laptop… It`s your fault anyway! You live with the Avengers – should`ve known better than to leave your stuff lying out."

"But it`s your birthday present, Tash! Why the hell would you snoop?"

"I didn`t! And anyway, I don`t like surprises, you know it". She acted like nothing happened. But for Clint, it was huge. But then another idea hit him. _"She didn`t mind Tony's present…"_

"Wait a minute" That sounded like he caught a criminal and was ready to solve a crime. "Did you know what Tony was planning to give you? And give me an honest answer."

She gave him a guilty half smile.

"Oh my god, how twisted is that!" Clint was shocked – that was too weird for him. How could she know and not do anything?

"Come on, Clint! You know that if Stark wants to do something, he'll do it at any cost. So I decided to help him to choose the right…variant. I asked Jarvis to delete some varieties of, let just say, handcuffs and leave a few of them that I liked, so any choice would`ve been right. Just a push in the right direction, that's all."

Clint`s jaw dropped open. Yes, she snooped, but he hadn`t expected that she had helped Stark to choose _that_ for herself! That was twisted. And absolutely wrong.

"But let`s keep this just between us and let Stark take all the fame for himself, alright?" Clint was still looking at her in awe. "Clint? Clint!" She was irritated by his reaction. "Hey you! Little boy! I`m gonna slap you if you don`t drop this frozen thing in one, two…" Clint realized what was she saying and suddenly remembered the last time she slapped him.

He jumped back in a second with his hands up, protecting himself and asking for mercy. "Okay, 'kay. Got it! Not a big deal! If you say so! But I still think that snooping was mean."

"You sound like an offended child, Barton! Anyway, I liked your present, so don`t whine". She added with a smile, which made him light up. "Let`s go back in there and get some drinks. Plus, Steve`s and Bruce`s presents have to be opened still!"

Clint opened a door for her, letting her go first and gave her a huge smile.

"Well, I don`t think Steve is ready to show himself and give you his fluffy present, after what happened! I hope that today won't give the poor guy nightmares."

The door closed, but behind it loud laughter was still heard.

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Please review. I am begging on my knees. It is too imporant request to be avoided. Please?


	7. What you want

She wasn't in bed.

Groaning, Clint started lazily putting his clothes on. He took the elevator and in a few minutes, he was on the roof. She was there. Oh, yes, she was.

Natasha was throwing knives into the nearest wall, with such power.

"We have a gym for that, you know," he said, and in a second, there was a knife flying past his right ear. But he stayed calm. There was no need to dodge or move elsewhere in horror. He knew she wouldn`t have missed it. Definitely.

"Good morning to you, too, sweetheart," he said sarcastically "What`s wrong?"

She was out of knives and started pulling them out of the wall – she was ruining some kind of fresco that was made with the help of the knives.

"I'm bored. And good morning to you too, hun. Want to join me in this 'wonderful' morning?" She`s being sarcastic today. How great, Clint thinks.

"We could spar instead, you know," he offered.

The wall caught two knives in a row.

"No, thank you."

"Why not? I thought you liked sparring with me." He thought it was offensive – her turning down his offer.

"I did. Well, I do." She stopped, like she was hiding her true feelings. But then, she opened up. "But I'm freaking tired of it! It`s been two weeks and we`ve been sparring every day. I want a mission, Clint! A goddamn mission! Is that too much to ask?" She turned to him, tense, holding the rest of the knives in her hand.

"Shh..Tash. Calm down. Don`t you like your 'vacation'? I thought you would be glad to have some free time, and some time with me," he said insidiously, clearly satisfied with himself.

She continued throwing her weapons, clearly _not_ that satisfied.

"Well, yes…But I'm tired of just sex and sparring! Sparring - sex, sex – sparring…Yeah, of course, it`s great, cool, but still I want a mission! I miss them so much! Just a little one, and I'd be satisfied."

"Wait, did you just describe our sex as 'cool?' Are you serious?" If you could just see his face… the mix of disappointment, dissatisfaction and…was that pity?

"Okay, will it make you happy if I say that that you're the most wonderful lover that I've ever had?" Clint`s smile rose to his ears – that was a good news. "And I enjoy every second that you give me. Is that enough, or I should continue?"

"Well, I think that`s enough for today." After a few minutes watching each other grinning, he continued, "It`s cold here, you know. On the roof. And we _do_ have a gym. Five different gyms, to be accurate."

"I am waiting for a call".

"I`m sorry, but that's dumb. You know that Jarvis would tell you if someone called. And why the hell here? I still don't understand."

"There's a better connection out here".

Clint`s eyes widened. Was she going mad?

"Tash, what`s the difference? What the hell are you talking about?"

She stopped throwing knives and turned abruptly to Clint.

"What if Stark told his AI not to tell me about Fury`s calls? Or what if something has broken down in the Tower? Or the connection is bad? I am waiting for a call."

"Because there`s a better connection out here? Oh, hun, you`re going crazy." He crossed the space and hugged her tightly. She, to his surprise, didn`t resist. "You want a mission, more than anything in the world, don`t you? So why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"What would that change?" She mumbled into his shoulder.

"I would`ve trashed the office and found you a mission. I would do anything for you, just for you to be happy. That`s all I need, you know? All I need."

"Orghhhh…" She pushed herself from him. "Too much fluff, Clint. I got it. No need to continue. But still, there`s nothing you can do…" The space between them fell into silence. Until she started that song again… "But how could they forget about their best agent? I'm too good to not to be given a mission! I am needed! Everywhere! Everywhere, and always."

"It freaks you out, doesn`t it?" he asked with a kind smile, like questioning a baby.

"You're damn right – it freaks me out! I'm begging for a mission. Please, please, please…"

"Oh, Tash. You didn`t say that, did you?" Clint looked at her with horror.

She couldn`t understand his reaction – moments before he said that he would do everything for her, and now he's afraid of her repeating what she wants.

"So what?" she asked defiantly.

The sky filled with smoke, and something was sparkling kilometers away. Something huge flew by them and hit the Tower somewhere in the middle with whistle. A huge blow was heard. Both of the agents ducked, and when they turned to see where that thing had come from, they spotted another one. This time, it was aiming at them.

A slight sense of irritation was in the air.

"Well, Black Widow always get what she wants, doesn`t she?"

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I`m opened to any ideas, critisism and whatever you want to say. Or express. Don`t be shy and just do it.


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